Bedroom Escape Day: A list of Bedroom Activities for When the World is Sucking too Badly

My bedroom has always been my safe haven, my Cubbie Hole of Bliss you could say. And not just because for the obvious reasons *wink *wink, but there is something to be said about the calming effect it has on my spirit when I just need a break. Over the years I’ve mastered the art of soft lighting and luxurious textiles that caress my weathered skin, hungry for some solitude and kindness. Now that the snow has fallen my desire to batten down the hatches has grown even more so, drawing my blinds closed until the Spring.

As I mentioned before, by no means do I associate time to my bedroom as a place where I skulk and withdraw from Joy. In fact its where I come to recharge, free myself from the distractions and negativity in a space I can control. Every now and again I use it specifically for a day when I need to filter out the world a bit and get some reprieve from the ugly; Calgary weather included. When I’m in my fortress of solitude I don’t just lay in my bed with my covers pulled over my head like you may have imagined. In fact it may be some of the most productive time that I spend with myself. Some may wonder how is it possible to stay so busy and entertained within such a small space let alone by oneself. Well let me put you on to some simple ideas that you may want to consider next time you want a break from the world.

This idea came to me almost 10 years ago and has stuck ever since. It was rooted in nostalgia originally from my days in high school and university where we’d rotate stacks of fashion magazines. It seems like when social media took over and magazines/gossip could be accessed more readily online that the fascination with print died. In a genius move, I brought it back for days like this. I’d buy the Cosmopolitan, People, Vogue, and Rolling Stone to name a few. I’d read them from back to front like I had 20 years ago because we all know the juicy stuff was in the back. I love coming across the perfume tester pages so that I could rub its papery fragrance all over me like I was headed to a 7th grade dance hoping to score my first French kiss. But what is a stack of magazines without a bag of Twizzlers- its not so grab two!

Run yourself a professional bath- my bathroom is open concept so technically its still in my room. The decorative candles bordering your soaker tub that may have a layer of dust on them-Light those Puppies! For gods sake candles are meant to burn, and they aren’t an ambient accent unless they are lit sis. Next, throw on some kick ass jazz or whatever tunes get you singing along sorrowfully. For me its Nina Simone, Lana Del Ray, Tash Sultana, or my ultimate fave; 80’s Hair Band Ballads. Those you can really murder the best with your angelic voice as loudly as unnecessarily possible. I love a good ol’ sing along to some Guns and Roses Don’t Cry. I imagine you’ll remember lyrics that you hadn’t sang since you were backcombing your bangs and getting spiral perms. When your done, make sure you moisturize the hell out of your body with every miracle cream that’s under your sink and lay there butt ass naked until every fragrant globule of magical serum is absorbed. You may look like a buttered biscuit, but guess what, buttered biscuits are delicious.

Make yourself a snack platter you can graze on all day. It needs to be complete with all the cheeses, meats, dips, olives, bits and bites. Include some fruits to cut the salt intake, it will make you feel like you are indulging in a healthy way. Hell, even make yourself a jug of spa water and finish that up to ensure you are adequately hydrated as the goal here is to rejuvenate and recharge.

Do something creative whether its writing a blog, sketching, brainstorming interior design ideas, or coming up with small business ideas. These often can manifest themselves into bigger goals in the future that could materialize into new passions. Perhaps write a poem, or get out an old cute note book and jot down some free thought words. Let your mind go a bit and do something maybe out of the ordinary. Maybe you like nail art, try doing something different with your nails by watching a you tube tutorial on it. Or learn a new braid and practice it in the mirror. These are all little things that we often too busy for in our lives to consider as being alternatively mindless but pleasant ways to spend time with yourself.

Play dress up. Get into that closet of yours and drag out the items you don’t wear often. Try to put new outfits together with these items that you can get excited about when you emerge from your Cubbie of Bliss. In fact while your in there, organize a weeks worth of outfits ahead of time. If your up for it you can take it up a notch and do a full runway show, documenting how freaking amazing your style is and celebrating your ability to repurpose that sequined blazer you wore once at a new years party 5 years ago. Sequins never die queens.

Put on an old 80’s movie and fall asleep to it. Go sweetly into a wonderland of REM sleep that’s influenced by the movies white noise guiding your Adventures in Babysitting, or perhaps a day off with Bueller. For some reason I feel like these naps are best had in jeans…odd suggestion I know, but how often do we get to sleep in our day clothes? I find denim warm and all encompassing, holding me together like a hug I consented too. There is an underlying feeling of unfamiliarity napping in the daytime with my clothes on…it’s laziness coming to fruition, not something I personally can always enjoy without guilt. But in the Cubbie of Bliss, there are no rules and there is no guilt because here you can spend the day however you wish.

So as you can see I have some unique ideas tailored to my own personal comforts and quirks. They are merely a guide to ignite your own exploration around finding ways to be with yourself if you struggle to sit in isolation but feel weary from the world around you. In fact I came across an article in Forbes stating that there are 7 Science Based Reasons Why Should Spend More Time Alone.

According to Amy Moren, a psychotherapist and the international bestselling author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do there are a multitude of studies that tout the benefits of solitude.

1. Alone time increases empathy. 

When you spend time with a certain circle of friends or your co-workers, you develop a “we vs. them” mentality. Spending time alone helps you develop more compassion for people who may not fit into your ‘inner circle.’

2. Solitude increases productivity.

Although so many offices have started creating open floor plans so everyone can communicate more easily, studies show being surrounded by people kills productivity. People perform better when they have a little privacy.

3. Solitude sparks creativity.

There’s a reason a lot of authors or artists want to go to a cabin in the woods or a private studio to work. Being alone with your thoughts gives your brain a chance to wander, which can help you become more creative.

4. Being alone can help you build mental strength.

We’re social creatures and it’s important for us to have strong connections with other people. But, solitude may be just as important. Studies show the ability to tolerate alone time has been linked to increased happiness, better life satisfaction, and improved stress management. People who enjoy alone time experience less depression.

5. Solitude may reduce behavior problems in kids.

When you carve some solitude in your schedule you show your children that being along is a healthy thing to do. And research shows kids who learn to by themselves are better behaved than other children. Be a good role model and teach solitary skills early.

6. Being alone gives you an opportunity to plan your life.

Most people spend a lot of time planning weddings and vacations but never plan how to get the most out of life. Spending time alone can give you a chance to ensure there’s a purpose to all of your hustling and bustling. Quiet space provides an opportunity think about your goals, your progress, and changes you want to make in your life.

7. Solitude helps you know yourself.

Being alone helps you become more comfortable in your own skin. When you’re by yourself, you can make choices without outside influences. And that will help you develop more insight into who you are as a person.

Thank you for continuing to read, follow and comment on my unique brand of crazy tales and thoughts! Lett me know in the comment section what you love to do in solitude!

Organizing Spaces for the ADHD Mind: How to Optimize Your Wellness

Spring is time where I utilize the surge of energy that typically comes about during this time of year where the signs of Winter have begun to dissipate. It’s also the time where I tend to purge and tackle the corners and baskets of things I have acquired over the months, which can be significant as a busy career woman who just so happens to be diagnosed with adult ADHD.

Home organization is a skill that can be learned by anyone at any time, however it took years for me to understand its purpose in my life outside the of the obvious benefits of a well organized home. Sure, its great to know where to find things, and lets not forget the aesthetics of it all where people have capitalized on it like The Gals of Home Edit who had a YouTube Series thanks to Reese Witherspoon.

Check Out Other Series: 9 Shows That Will Help You Be More Organized

And while these are popular I often feel like its easier said than done if you don’t have an ADD/ADHD mind. You see ADHD is a spectrum disorder that manifests through the eight executive processes of the brain:

  1. flexible thinking
  2. working memory
  3. self-monitoring
  4. task initiation
  5. planning
  6. organization
  7. impulse control
  8. and emotional control.

Basically, the executive functions of the brain help you plan, organize, and complete tasks.

If you have ADHD, and are trying to organize your home, it’s likely that you are struggling with one (or more) of these executive functions, which makes home organization especially challenging. Challenging, but not impossible. These processes at any point in my day are activated, and consequently working to grab hold of the the reigns, often switching direction. at the drop of a hat

So not only is it important that I nurture good habits such as scheduling my days; often down to minute detail in order to stay productive and on top of things, I also need the order visually to get it all done. But there are only so many hours in the day, and lets not forget we need to allow time to live and have a good time. This was mentioned in Attitude Magazine-Inside the ADHD MIND, where JUDITH KOLBERG suggests to Ditch perfectionism when organizing one’s home.

Judith states “I have not researched the link between perfectionism and ADHD, but I have seen it many times. Perfectionism appears to exacerbate executive function deficits. If I have two clients with the same ADHD symptoms, and one is a perfectionist, it is harder for the perfectionist to get organized. Start a project with the understanding that perfection is not the goal, progress is.”

While I am guilty of getting fairly hyper-focused on a task at hand, the fruits of those tasks can help to decrease the anxiety that comes along with feeling flustered or chaotic in my brain. This is not true for all as everyone is different, and perhaps do better with an entirely different strategy to mitigate the spiraling that can occur in our busy minds.

For myself mornings are particularly important as I need to physically and mentally set the tone for the course of my crazy day in the world of Child Protection Social Work. At any point in my day, it can take a drastic turn, whether I have a pile of new assignments, an emergency apprehension, court appearance, or stuck in a snow bank on the side of rural road with no cell service. So if at 7am my blood pressure soars through the roof because I can’t find that one pair of pants that goes with the boots that I’ve already decided upon were going to make me the Boss Ass Bitch I need to be that day. It could be, and has been my unravelling all before I’ve even managed to eat my Cheerios.

This weekend I planned on Working Out, Cooking a Good Meal, Going to Home Depot, Fencing in My Garden Beds, Taking the Dog for a Walk, Maybe See a Friend, and Planting my Herb Garden. Oh…and Write a Blog. What I actually did was a mish mash of a few of these things, some half done, as new shinier options presented themselves. Who knew all it would take was the need to make more space under my sink for my dollar store haul. And if wasn’t for the repeated explosion of make up sponges, costco size q-tips, and every self tanning bronzer known to man under there falling out, I’d think it was time for a purge.

So as I added more stuff to my hidden stock pile lair, it was a reminder that if I can’t see it, I think I need it, and often forget I already have it most likely by the dozen. Let me remind you that the ADHD mind is forgetful as all hell, so its no wonder I forgot the treasures that were unearthed. It felt like Christmas again, in fact much of my Christmas stocking stuffers were still in there unopened and neglected. As I mentioned before, having things in front of me in a way that corresponds with the sequences in my mind makes things more streamlined.

Lets start with a couple spaces I tackled today, and see if you can relate!

Cosmetics

  1. Dump it all out & Clean Them– Not only will they look better once you put them back, but think about the oils, bacteria, and just overall grime that build up on items that get tossed in your purse often. I know my lids get the gucked up mess on them, random hair, sand, and lord knows what else caked at the base of the lids. Don’t be that person that grows a knew mutant strain of mouth herpes on their lip gloss.
  2. Clean Your Brushes– I know we shouldn’t be having this discussion by now but besides bacteria, brushes also accumulate dead skin cells and oil, which can clog your pores and lead to dull or broken out skin. Clean brushes apply makeup better. Even the best makeup can become streaky and patchy when applied with a dirty brushClean bristles will assure a smoother application.
  3. Proper Cosmetic Storage/Organizers– While you are on a disinfecting streak by now don’t forget to Clean Your Storage/Acrylic Cases too, and perhaps you need more if you find your stuff overflowing. I like to not only organize my cosmetics by type but also by size as to ensure I can fully see all that I have available to me. This is important again for the ADHD mind like mine as I forget often what I have unless it is directly in front of me. Some may say, why have to many options then, and I say MInd Your Business.
  4. Get Rid of What You Don’t Use– This goes for samples, palettes with obnoxious colors that may work for a YouTuber or Make-Up Artist. But if you are like myself, I stick to a pretty basic look, and stay in my lane when it comes to being adventurous with make up and my limited talents. That’s not to say others won’t love some of those impulse buys (another ADHD trait). I’m an Ipsy Subsrciber who has somehow not been able to figure out how to cancel my subscription for two years. Which has left me with an abundance of small make up bags that I like to fill with the make up I don’t use, or didn’t like. Once cleaned/disinfected they make great little gifts for the teens I work with, or alternatively cool donations for Women’s Shelters, Trans-gendered Programming, or Outreach Centers.
Final Product

Closet SPace

  1. Switch Out Seasonal Items– I personally do not have a Kardashian Sized Closet Space, however my shopping habits would suggest otherwise. Which is why its even more important to make room and space in my closet to reacquaint myself with the Spring/Summer Clothing I have before I decide to go buy more. It also helps me get rid of stuff too that perhaps is on its last days, or has seen brighter days. I may have been too distracted to notice a stain on it when it went into hibernation or a hole that needed mending. So when one is reacqainted again we can assess its current status as in Keep, Donate, or Toss.
  2. Assess What Basics You Are Missing -These are the core element of almost every outfit, and because they get worn a lot, prepare your wardrobe with your fave go to’s like my personal favorite, the Alix NYC Essex Bodysuit in a few essential colors. You can stack an outfit on top of these staple items whereby I’m often using my busy mind as I shower to organize the next step of my morning.
  3. Color Wheel Your Clothing/Accessories– Maybe its from all the years of working in retail, but there is an element of pleasure attached with the synchronization of colors. Much how we respond fondly to a rainbow when we see it in the sky, I get the same Dopamine response to rainbow in my closet. Not only that, but when I need a black shirt, my visual orientation isn’t pulled in 20 different directions. My ability to make a decision is made much more simpler when I can see what it is I’m looking for in that moment before it may be pulled in another direction that could very well turn into a pile of clothes on the middle of my floor and a layer of stress sweat forming under my boobs.

Hopefully you found this helpful, or at least relatable- You are not alone in that crazy head of yours. If you liked this post make sure you like, comment and share!

Follow me on Facebook @shegotthatbpe

Follow me on Instagram @cece_a_broadtalez

Celebrating Satin & Sequins: Fashion is the Armor to Survive Everyday Life

By Mid-November the last of the fall colors here in Calgary have been covered by the frigid snow and ice, revealing a prism of deep and rich romance. Velvety navy blues and crimson reds paint the morning skies as our breath kisses the air; the warmth is transformed into a dimension of little crystalized diamonds. It is the time of year when wearing Satin and Sequins help emulate magic as they capture the glow from the twinkling lights that dance throughout our homes and city scape during the festive winter Months.

And as Christmas winds down, the next event many of us look forward too is New Years Eve, whereby we can drape ourselves in decadent sequins and Sexy Satins. This year was unlike any New Years we have ever endured, as many slept their way into the New Year, cloaked in cotton jammies. I on the other hand was working a night shift and can only remember wearing the drool that had dried on my cheek during a lapse of mid-shift narcolepsy.

Glamorous I know.

So you can imagine I missed the pomp and circumstance that I anticipate each year when I get to have my Cinderella Moment, glass slippers and all.

Julep (@julepmaven) • Instagram photos and videos | Shopaholic quotes,  Sparkle quotes, Life quotes to live by
Brighter Than a Star Sequin Jumpsuit- Fashion Nova

I can appreciate not everyone feels comfortable wearing something that demands the attention of a room, as we all have our own version of what we feel good in. For myself I don’t believe I can wait for another year to bust out my sequins, I need glamour, and I need it now.

Many shy away from wearing sequins and should not save these little textile gems for just the holiday season or for ones children’s dance recital costumes. According to Meghan Nesmith who wrote A HISTORY OF SEQUINS, FROM KING TUT’S TOMB TO YOUR NEW YEAR’S EVE OUTFIT, Sequins have been around since since Ancient Egypt. They have been unearthed in archeological sites from Pakistan to Egypt. The earliest versions were gold nuggets, hammered into thin circles and pierced through the center. Heaps of them were found scattered across Tutankhamun’s tomb, some deeply colored by iron deposits in shades of red and purple, or sewn in shapes of flowers along his ceremonial robe, both to indicate his importance and keep the king tricked out in the afterlife.

Like the sun god himself, King Tut literally beamed. He was the drag queen of his time in my opinion!

I figured there is no time like the now to still adorn yourself like Cleopatra, and unleash your inner queen. Here are some of my fave’s I came across:

Plunge Asymmetric Maxi Dress in Sequin
ASOS Editionus.asos.com$67.60
Light Rust Sheer Pant FE NOEL fenoel.com$278.00

Spring Summer Sequins- Club London 105.00
ASOS EDITION plunge mini dress in yellow sequin C$114.05
Sabrina Satin Joggers - Olive
Sabrina Satin Joggers – $44.99 USD

So Lets not delay my friends, the Satin and Sequins are feeling neglected these days. Whether its a trip to the fridge, or your home office is tired of seeing you in the same dirty sweats- there is no wrong time to be glamorous!

I’ll leave you with this:

quote text Glitter inspiration i was bored black green girly Preppy gold  glitter prep this is fun chevron tumblr at night nightblogging my  typography preppy blog so many hashtags she who

Don’t forget to Like, Share and Comment Below!

Repeat After Me: I am allowed to look sexy, feel sexy, and be in love. I am worthy of all of those things. And so are you.

Me in all my Fluffy Fabulousness

I would have been around 7 or 8 years old when I recognized my body was built differently than the other girls my age. I had been in competitive figure skating from an early age, spending most of my mornings before school and after at the rink going between one lesson to another. I remember my favorite thing to do was go to the concession stand if my mom had given me some money and share an order of onion rings with my tiny friends. One of the sneaky things I used to do was comb the bottom of my fathers closet where change would fall from his pant pockets onto the floor. This would fund my concession trips on many occasions against my mother’s knowledge who was trying to mold her little Olympic Dream on skates. And as a result, treats were few and far between however and was always reminded that Onion Rings were not a “healthy option.” I didn’t understand why not, therefore given my personality felt more inclined to indulge in the forbidden every chance I could get.

To put it into context further, I was the kid who had the homemade fruit leather and vegetable filled pitas in my lunch, which as an adult I would not complain about this at all. Especially considering my breakfast, lunches and sometimes dinner looks more like a reheated Triple Skinny Latte most of the time. But for myself all I wanted was the fruit roll ups I could stick on my finger like the rest of the kids and chew on its artificially sweetened chemically saturated nectar. Hot Dog days at school were especially difficult- I’d salivate over the Orange Drink and smells of boiled mystery meat and mustard. Walking home from school I was advised to not go to the corner store with friends, but my dads closet floor would always pull through and I’d have enough to buy a bag of O’Ryans Sour Cream and Onion chips, with its savory thick powder coating. The walk home would allow me enough time to eat it, and dispose of the evidence just in time.

By no means do I intend on framing my mother as restrictive or intentionally harmful with regards to the relationship I have with food. You see she knew all too well what I’d face growing up with regards to my weight and sense of self image because she too struggled. She grew up in a time when body positivity was not a “thing” and if you were overweight you would shield your imperfections from the world as to not offend anyone. She would sometimes tell me my clothes were too tight, as a way f trying to protect me from potential mean comments or stares she had endured. I remember her telling me that she would wear big earrings to draw attention to her face and away from her body. I too often use this jokingly when I simply need an excuse to wear big gaudy earrings that only I could appreciate. My mom knew the world could be cruel to me and did not want to see me endure the same kind of judgement she had been through.

So when I could be seen in comparison to the other tiny ice nymphs it was clear I was going to be a bull within the china shop. At that time my favorite Figure Skater at that time was Serina Bonnelly, a muscular powerhouse of fierce athleticism. I wanted to be her. In fact I’d attack my jumps and spins with the same kind of ferocity I imagined she did. Fearlessly I’d approach my set ups with a crazed adrenaline determined that could out-do any element of grace required to stick a landing. I wanted to go into them fast and hard, like a kamikaze pilot raging into battle. As a result I’d often fall just as hard, getting up each time to try it 30-40 more times. I wasn’t concerned though about the falls because I loved the feeling of taking flight with the robust capabilities that my body gifted me with.

As my skating career continued I had begun Precision Skating with a group of 20 other girls, which is now known s synchronized skating now. I remember being fitted for my costume, it was an Annie themed routine, and I wore an electric red body suit with a little white collar. There I was with my oddly shaped 7 year old body, you know the one, round bellied sprinkled with hints of puberty. My legs were strong and I was a powerful skater with a tooshie to match. I loved Precision skating as it was so unique to work with a team as opposed to being alone on the ice. We had gone to a competition with our Annie program and we had taken team photos after winning first place in our category beaming with delight. I’d get the long awaited photo and pull it from its envelope and look for myself in the photo, and it didn’t take long as I stood out appearing like a brown haired chubby cherub in a red body suit. I no longer wanted to be Serina Bonnelly, I wanted to be skinny and tiny like the rest of the girls.

My heart breaks for my 7 year old self with that statement.

Similar situations like the Precision Team picture would occur into my adolescence. I continued to be powerful, strong and heavy into sports like Rowing and Field Hockey which I would excel in. Lazy I was not and loved competing and enjoying the thrills of being an athlete. But sure enough, with every team I was on, there I would be, standing out in photos, with my bottom heavy thick legs and thighs among the petit bodies that I wanted so much to be like. I remember hitting grade 11 and had decided I’d drop some weight going from 136 lbs. to 120 lbs. Weekends we would order pizza to our dorm and I’d savor my allowed portion by eating the slice in layers, starting with the cheese, then the soft dough, moving down to the bare bones of the crust.

I actually still eat pizza this way now, except I eat 4 pieces with ranch and hot sauce.

During that time in high school I had heavy training related to my sports teams, but additionally I’d spend my nights in the weight room working out on my own when everyone else was hanging out. I thought maybe if I could get “skinny” things would get better for me. Maybe I’d be more desired by the popular boys, maybe the cool girls would want to closer to me as a friend, maybe teachers would pay attention to me or even maybe I’d be noticed more for my accomplishments like the skinny girls were. What I wanted was to be seen and appreciated. It seemed like this happened so effortlessly for the skinny girls. This was the message the world was giving me at this time. It was reinforced by the early warnings of my mother who had shared similar experiences of being treated differently feeling that society did not value fat people. In my experience the ridicule came in the form of feeling often invisible in the crowd and achievements unacknowledged despite my efforts, dedication and performance.

“If we make self-love or body acceptance conditional, the truth is, we will never be happy with ourselves. The reality is that our bodies are constantly changing, and they will never remain exactly the same. If we base our self-worth on something as ever-changing as our bodies, we will forever be on the emotional roller coaster of body obsession and shame.”

— Chrissy King

By graduation, I was tiny, and I looked phenomenal catching the eye of those who underestimated this newly blonde and bodacious bombshell. I worked that form fitting Latin inspired dress like a rockstar…it was my night to shine and it felt so good to be looked at for once. I remember my father continued to comment on how amazing I looked and how everybody was staring at his gorgeous daughter.

I felt seen finally!

It was like a drug for a girl that felt so invisible.

Image may contain: 6 people, people smiling
Grade 12
Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, people standing
1997-ish

After high school I’d venture into a world that was far more forgiving, team photos a distant past and tucked away in a box. My inner desire to feel the urge to compare and regulate my body weight would be fleeting depending on where I was at emotionally. Having my daughter would push me over the 200 lb. mark and keep me there 20 years later. I’ve fluctuated since then losing 10, gaining 20, losing 30, gaining 10. The game continues today. I’ve done weight watchers, Keto, G.I. diet, HCG, and gone vegetarian all with great results. I remember in June this year I’d lose 25 lbs on a quick and restrictive calorie deficit diet, feeling like I had hit the jackpot finally on my quest to feel good in the body I was given. I had been anticipating a night out with friends and planned an outfit that would show off my newly smaller frame. I’d put this outfit on and immediately hated how my body looked in it. Parts of my figure that I loved before no longer were accentuated in ways that made me unique from the pack. I looked like a deflated and more invisible version of myself than ever before. This was not the kind of reinforcement I had hoped for in the quest to continue my journey to be more visible and accepted in the world. And wouldn’t you know, within months I’d go back to the fluffier and more filled out version of myself.

I cannot win, but I’m okay with it.

Let me just say this, the happiest I’ve been with regards to my how I feel about my body is when I can work out 5 days a week and eat what I want. During my most gym dedicated times as my commitment often varies, did I ever lose any significant weight, but my body would change as did my confidence. Do I get “Skinny” by doing this, absolutely not as you can see. What does change though is my confidence and acceptance of how my body looks and more importantly what I can do with it. I continue to try and free myself from the chains of a scale and the displayed numbers that are not necessarily a determinant with regards to measuring the contentment within myself. In addition I’m so pleased to see how society and women especially have embraced the body positive movement, and that plus size models are no longer seen as the other or niche market. On social media you can see women of all shapes and sizes celebrated for their beauty and unique figures, all sporting a sense of renewed confidence that is refreshing for a woman like me who has been welcoming this moment since she was 7 years old.

I recognize that body augmentation remains to be highly sought after with women desiring to attain fuller curves and minimized waists. It mimics the same patterns I felt in my early years looking to be noticed in the hopes to have access to the same recognition and opportunities that appeared to come so easily to the skinnies. And do not get me wrong, I am not against any form of augmentation that a woman desires to get, as long as she feels good about herself and does not risk her health in doing so. What I do caution though within my experience of sharing that sense of wanting to belong and be seen is to not expect that in doing so doors will open or life will get easier. Life remains the same and is contingent on the ambition and confidence you have within- You Cannot Fake It. If cosmetic and plastic surgery opens the door for confidence to root its seeds deep within you then its a win in my eyes. To each their own whichever road you choose.

And to be fully transparent I would love to get a few things nipped, tucked and sucked! I’m 42 and I have at least another 5-6 years of pool parties in me- I wanna go out with a Bang before Menopause hits and I have hair growing out of my chest and bouts of lunacy. If I wasn’t so darn practical and lets admit…peasant poor… I’m sure I would have already dove head first into it. In addition I feel like I have some heavy work to do before taking the easy the way out. I’ve been saying to myself, first get healthy and super fit, see where you land in terms of results then go from there. Lets see if this materializes, don’t hold your breath y’all!

Each individual woman’s body demands to be accepted on its own terms.   

Gloria Steinem

  

No photo description available.
Confidence Starts on the Inside- Do I look worried about you think?
If Unbothered was a Swimsuit….

I believe I’m not the only one in this revolving door of wavering confidence mixed with good intentions and intermittent self discipline as it pertains to managing weight. And I don’t believe us full figured women are the only ones that can get consumed with the numbers on the scale. I’ve often heard my slender beauty’s say that there is an element of competition and scale number comparison’s among themselves. They’ve told me other women will ask them how much they weigh and from there put themselves into a frenzy to keep up and out-do that number. I was extremely uncomfortable learning that those kind of conversations even exist. I assure you in the fluffy girl world we do not discuss numbers let alone divulge them in conversation! That’s a no go zone!

But it does not surprise me either.

Shamelessly I admit I’ve been binge watching the Kardashians and on countless occasions the opening scenes start with “Oh my god your so skinny.” Whether its that Jonathon Chaban “Food God” or one the sisters, I cannot believe that is an acceptable way to either greet someone or say hello. What baffles me even more is how this guy eats the way he does and stays looking like Skeletor, I swear the man two finger diets his way through life. Its cringe worthy every time I hear them say it on the show, I just want to jump into the TV and give their necks a choke. I miss fluffy Khloe by the way!

This way of being extends itself to the world outside of the Kardashians whereby other women will refer to other women as “those skinny bitches.” I’m sure you have either been guilty of it or heard it from someone. I challenge you to think about how you felt in that moment and ask yourself what did I mean when I said that to someone?

Did I mean I think they are beautiful?

Did I mean I think they look like they have been working really hard at getting healthy and toning up?

Why did I not just say something more specific with regards to what I admire about them?

I think often our own insecurities become disguised in our admiration of others and can be damaging to them. It’s essentially role reversal body shaming and its not a good look either. Again I think it boils down to the perceived idea that being thin carries the illusion that life must be easier as a result of the smaller number on the scale. Thin, thick, in the middle, we all have the same struggles, that being the journey to love thy damn self and the vessel that god gave you. It has taken me a long time to come full circle with regards to not allowing my value and self worth to be dictated by the failures of the sliding numbers on the scale. As long as body positivity continues to trend and we begin to see a larger array of women being celebrated in various media platforms I think we can begin to close the divide of misconceptions. Taking the initial steps to be kind within ourselves will open the doors to consider being kind to others, being authentic in our admirations of others, and opening the door for dialogue, understanding and acceptance.

“So the question is, which boulder are you going to choose to roll? The ‘must lose weight’ boulder or the ‘fuck you I will boldly, defiantly accept the body I’ve got and LIVE IN IT’ boulder?”

— Kate Harding

We are all Beautiful!

The Medical Aesthetics Glow-Up: The Journey To Loving My Skin Again

I was born in the late 70’s having spent the majority of my childhood in the 80’s and adolescence in the 90’s grunge era whereby the more plaid you wore and sadder you appeared, the more you were winning in the eyes of the fashion police.

See Pictures

The beauty icons of my generation were the Kate Moss’s, Christy Turlington’s and lets not forget the blonde and bodacious Claudia Schiffer. There wasn’t one dorm room wall at my boarding school during that time that wasn’t plastered by her Guess Ads. And while fashion magazines were passed hand to hand faster than crack on the streets of Detroit, there was no signs of their influence on us. Despite what we saw in those magazines, there was this unspoken acceptance with the fact that those beauty standards were unattainable unless you were born with gazelle legs and fine featured bone structure. We had made peace with that reality once we had hit puberty and hit our peak growth by 13. And this was okay. We knew we weren’t models and beauty wasn’t the broad and widely accepted diverse kind of standards we have now. It was almost like by acknowledging that we didn’t fit the mold that we were able to channel our efforts and energy into other things that gave us joy. You see having grown up in a time with no social media, there was no need to appease the masses for superficial adoration. Attention and praise would be awarded to those who did good at sports, were considered pretty cute or were outgoing and charismatic. Occasionally some would have the trifecta and then others like myself would blend somewhere in the middle.

Which of These Claudia Schiffer Photos Is From 1989?

Now that’s not to say that we didn’t attempt to attain some level of beauty practices, but it really wasn’t something that consumed much of our time. Our nightly routines in boarding school would have us in the bathrooms with Noxema burning away at our nostrils leaving our skin seemingly clean and refreshed. We’d also exfoliate with our St.Ives apricot scrub every second day, leaving it on longer for optimal effect. We’d go to sleep with dried acne treatment spots and pray that it would work its magic before morning.

Mornings may have included some dabs of Body Shop White Musk perfume oil, some poorly matched skin concealer, and lip smackers to finish off. I assure you there was no faces “getting beat” or “contouring” happening. There was a one shade/item fits all kind of approach; that was the magical “can’t live without” concealer for morning, noon and night. I didn’t even know that I was supposed to pluck my eyebrows until I was in grade 12 and then that was when the over plucking was all the rage. Didn’t take this gal too long before she had some epic thin quarter moon shaped brows dancing in the middle of her forehead. This thread thin trend is solely responsible for my dependence on the expensive Nano Brow/Make Up tattooing required to fix the mistakes of my youthful ignorance. Ironically, the brow correction led me back to the 90’s famous Cindy Crawford Brow Game!

Book Robin Yu who did my amazing brows!

My interest and curiosity over the years has continued to build momentum as the world of medical aesthetics continues to boom in popularity. It’s no longer something that only the celebrities of Hollywood get; its the stay at home, mom next door, or the beautiful young waitress’s that are the major fans spilling through the doors. Gone are the days where we see the obvious tells of invasive plastic surgery whereby anyone with eyes would do a hard pass on. It would be a close friend of mine who was in her mid 20’s that sold me on finally taking the plunge to get Dermal filler in my lips and Botox done. I would admire her pillowy full lips and taut skin and wonder could I achieve that or should I just embrace my aging skin and throw in the towel?

I think often as women we have these internal conversations with ourselves and are quick to admire others and then cower in the corner when it comes to admiring ourselves. The famous line from Dirty Dancing prances into my mind shouting “Nobody puts Baby in the Corner!” when I think that way now. And with no Patrick Swayze around to coax me into the spotlight me, I’ve often had conversations with myself like this:

Why spend money on this when I’m not even going anywhere whereby looking good matters? Why start now, I made it this far? How much difference will it really make, just face it, your getting old, deal with it! Maybe if I was an exotic dancer or in the business of needing to look good would it be worth it but why do I need porn lips doing child protection? Colleagues and other professionals might judge me and take me less seriously if I look like I’m trying too hard?

Does any of this sound like a familiar conversation you’ve had with yourself?

Even when I read this or hear myself say these things out loud I actually become very uncomfortable and unfamiliar with this version of myself. You see; that’s the sound of poor self confidence and a woman putting too much power in the hands of others who’s opinions shouldn’t matter. I don’t even recognize her and here’s the reason why.

Ever since I listened to that authentic and genuine little voice in my head that said:

“What if you absolutely love it and you walk out with your head held high?”

” What if you get it done and see results that make you smile?”

These are the two questions that plunged me forward into a love affair with medical aesthetics and I’ve never looked back. Sometimes letting go of doubt and the negative self image can be scary especially when you are an over-thinker like me. Our subconscious can begin to work double time when it sees a new cowgirl roll into town, perched high on her horse, appropriately named CONFIDENCE!

*three fierce snaps*

“Poke Me Prod Me, But Don’t Touch the Hair”

Now the reason I brought up my early years with regards to my beauty practices is because I think they had a lot to do with what took me so long to get to this place of appreciation for myself. No longer do I carry the attitude of the “me vs. them”; we are all one in the same and having a career in which beauty is not relevant or a prerequisite. However it is relevant in every other aspect of my life as a mother, daughter, girlfriend, social worker, mentor and friend is the qualities that stem from my confidence and self love. The actions and impressions associated with one’s confidence can have positive lasting effects on those around you that can not only be rewarding for others to be around but give you a sense of purposefulness.

And I know I’m not alone in this as I took it upon myself to research what are the driving forces behind the popularity. I discovered that Revenues for minimally invasive aesthetic procedures are forecasted to grow about 10% to 15% a year in the United States. They rose nearly 200% from 2000 to 2010, and the market share for those procedures rose from 30% to almost 50%, the American Society of Plastic Surgery reports. That ratio is expected to rise to more than 70%. In another report, the global medical aesthetics market is expected to grow at a CAGR of 11.5% from 2019 to reach $22.2 billion by 2025. The Canada Aesthetic Devices is expected to grow at a CAGR of 10 – 12 % during the forecast period ( 2020-2027) .

With these Growth Rates there is something to be said about what is driving these numbers and its not just my girlfriend Brittany and her gorgeous face. I will give her props for pushing me out of the dark ages but clearly she isn’t solely responsible for the increased interest. I looked further into the steady upswing in growth outside the linear world of the obvious aesthetically pleasing components and learned the following:

Medical aesthetic treatments provide greater benefits than just enhancing the physical appearance of the patients. Some of the treatments provide sense of improved self-esteem, leading to better psychological conditions of the patients. Treatments such as Botox can help to deal with the enormous sweating and migraines. When Botox is injected in the armpits of the patients it immediately paralyses the sweat glands, leading to lesser sweat released.

Similarly, dermal fillers are majorly used for filling the wrinkles lines on the patient’s face with a solution made of hyaluronic acid, but the same fillers are also used to smoothen and repair the skin that has been damaged by accidental scars or wounds. Thus, various health benefits associated with aesthetics procedures further drives the consumers to undergo these procedures for not just fulfilling the aesthetics needs but also as a solution for various other health issues.

There have been many technological innovations and advancements that are taking place in the medical aesthetics market. The latest advancements in the laser technology have led to its increased application in medical aesthetics. These advancements in laser provide benefits such as, small incisions, decrease in the intensity of pain and fast recovery after the procedure. There has been a notable increase in the application of laser technology for various cosmetic treatments such as hair removal, skin rejuvenation and body contouring. Transdermal focused ultrasound, monopolar RF, low level laser, high intensity focused ultrasound (HIFU) and cryolipolysis are some of the advancements in the laser technology that are used for many aesthetics treatments such as body contouring and fat reduction. Laser devices no longer come as a set of bulky and complicated machines to operate and have become more advanced with the introduction of small hand-held diode lasers. These technological advancements have made the cosmetic procedures to be more quick and impactful, which is further expected to support the demand of medical aesthetics products.

And lets not forget our Digital Millennials who are Creating a “Happy Marketplace” driven by a growing sense of wellness and self-care – particularly in younger consumers – interest in medical aesthetics treatments is at an all-time high, according to the results of a global study. These are your instagram influencers, beauty and lifestyle bloggers which are able to tap into markets that traditional commercial advertising can’t. Jeffrey Frentzen writes that demand stems from increased public acceptance of medical aesthetics and safer, more effective non-invasive treatments. The field has seen a rising adoption of procedures among men, as well as millennials and younger generations thanks in part to the Internet, television and social media influencers.

Demand for the older groups such as Gen-X and Baby Boomers continues to grow but at a slower rate. Adults under 45 are nearly twice as likely to consider aesthetic procedures compared with those over 45.

Here are some additional Growth Factors Worth Noting:

The rapidly aging population where age spots, wrinkles and the change of skin elasticity becomes more prominent

Increased demand among the male population

Technological advancements, including little recovery time for minimally invasive and non-invasive procedures

Growing FDA approval of medical aesthetic devises in the United States

Improved treatment results with decreased side-effects

Increased awareness among patients about the appropriate procedures available

Low-cost of certain procedures with arise in disposable income

So with that being said count me in as a life long consumer of the advancing word of medical aesthetics which will hold a place in my beauty regiment regularly. To be included as well I should note that the Noxema and St.Ives Apricot Scrub are a distant memory along with the hormonal acne of my adolescence. Those too have been replaced with an amazing and highly regarded skin care line called ZoSkinCare that provides a comprehensive approach to creating and maintaining healthy skin for anyone, regardless of age, ethnicity, unique skin condition or skin type. From correcting sun damage + pigmentation to preventing new damage + protecting against future damage. Shop ZoSkinCare online or Available at Skin Possible Laser & Light Solutions.

If you are a resident of Calgary or planning on visiting I highly recommend Cosmetic Nurse Injector:

Angela Street(Angela@skinpossible.ca)

Address: 1800 194 Ave SE #2150, Calgary, AB T2X 0R3Hours

Closed ⋅ Opens 9 a.m. Wed

Phone(403) 719-6523