50 Shades of Red: How to Choose the Perfect Red for that Beautiful Pucker

A couple of Red Lipped Foxes!

Hands down Red Lipstick has got to be my absolute favorite go to color for lips, and has never disappointed. Red lipstick has always been there for me when I paired a white t-shirt with some jeans and needed a touch of glam, or when I’ve gone all black and required a pop of drama. It’s been there for me during the holidays and complimented my agenda for seduction. If Red Lipstick was a girlfriend, she’d be the one who knew all your darkest secrets and be the one encouraging you to live your best hoe life. Red lipstick, like many of us girls has had a checkered past, carrying reputation with the harlots, hussies, and courtesans -victims of slut shaming. Perhaps that is why I feel wearing Red Lipstick is my tribute to the women before me who paved the way to paint my face as I see fit, without prejudice.

In the article Empowering, alluring, degenerate? The evolution of red lipstick it mentions that “Until lipstick was popularized in the early 20th century, red lips were often associated with morally dubious women: impolite, sexually amoral, even heretical. In the Dark Ages, red lips were seen as a sign of commingling with the devil. The makeup “was associated with this mysterious, frightening femininity,” says Rachel Felder, author of last year’s “Red Lipstick: An Ode to a Beauty Icon.

Red lipstick also has its roots in political movements throughout history, so wear it loud and wear it proud!

Here are some of the Reds I have come across and use!

Best Reds For Every Skin Tone

TUBE OF Shiseido Visionary Gel Lipstick in Shizuka Red on a white background
UNIVERSAL: SHISEIDO VISIONARY GEUNIVERSAL: LIPSTICK IN SHIZUKA RED

Shiseido’s most popular lipstick is a long-lasting, full-coverage lipstick that features a special gel technology that is weightless on the lips and also delvers full-coverage. The shade name is really something special to the brand too; Shizuka translates to “quiet” or “calm” in Japanese.

$26 (Shop Now)

bottle of Fenty Beauty uncensored on a white background
UNIVERSAL: FENTY BEAUTY UNCENSORED

When it comes to universal beauty, Fenty Beauty does best. The vibrancy and high pigmentation of Uncensored make it a favorite in Lagos, says Nigerian makeup artist Joyce Jacob.

$24 (Shop Now)

Bullet of Christian Louboutin Velvet Matte Lip Colour in Rouge Louboutin on a white background
UNIVERSAL: CHRISTIAN LOUBOUTIN VELVET MATTE LIP COLOUR IN ROUGE LOUBOUTIN

This luxurious lipstick may seem like a stretch, price-wise, but there is a reason it’s Net-a-Porter’s best-selling red in Paris, the city of red lipstick.

$90 (Shop Now)

Fair Complexions

25 Goldie Red, Rouge à Lèvres Satin Lipstick
25 Goldie Red, Rouge à Lèvres Satin Lipstick $ 42 Shop Here
Matte Lip Kit in Boujee
Kylie Cosmetics Lip Kit BOUJEE | MATTE LIP KIT $17.40 USD Shop Here
Colourpop Crme Lux Lipstick in On Display  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Fair Skin: Colourpop Crème Lux Lipstick in On Display
“In general, the lighter your skin, the lighter the hue of red,” explains Murphy. “Light and dark don’t only refer to skin tone, but also hair color and eyes; think of the overall impression.” If your skin is on the paler end of the spectrum, look for a red with a touch of pink for a playful take on a crimson lip.
$7 (Shop Now)
Tatcha Silk Lipstick in Kyoto Red  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Fair Skin: Tatcha Silk Lipstick in Kyoto Red
One of Murphy’s go-to reds for paler skin tones is Tatcha’s Kyoto Red Silk Lipstick, which looks like a garnet in lipstick form. “It’s a balanced, bright, perfect red,” he says. “It’s classic yet modern, and works on light-to-medium skin tones.”
$55 (Shop Now)
Tom Ford Fucking Fabulous Lip Color  best red lipstick according to skin tone
Fair Skin: Tom Ford Fucking Fabulous Lip Color
Everything about Tom Ford’s limited-edition red lipstick — reimagined in a sleek noir tube — is impossible to ignore. From the intense color payoff to the decadent texture and the bold name, it’s no wonder it’s a makeup artist’s favorite.
$60 (Shop Now)

Medium Complexions

Nars Velvet Matte Lip Pencil in Mysterious Red  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Medium Skin: Nars Velvet Matte Lip Pencil in Mysterious Red
“Nars Mysterious Red is a full-throttle, punchy blue-red,” describes Murphy, who recommends it clients with medium skin because of its highly-pigmented depth and wear time.
$27 (Shop Now)
Rimmel London Lasting Finish by Kate Lipstick in 001  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Medium Skin: Rimmel London Lasting Finish by Kate Lipstick in 001
If you’ve got golden or warm undertones, a fiery orange-red will be your new calling card. Rimmel London’s red lipstick (made in collaboration with iconic supermodel Kate Moss) costs roughly the same as a chai latte and delivers a seriously punchy finish.
$5 (Shop Now)
Fenty Beauty Mattemoiselle Plush Matte Lipstick in MaDamn  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Medium Skin: Fenty Beauty Mattemoiselle Plush Matte Lipstick in Ma’Damn
As if Rihanna would ever do us wrong. Fenty Beauty’s range of lippies includes everything from black, forest green, and Ma’Damn, a brilliant, royal red that looks incredibly rich on medium skin tone.
$18 (Shop Now)
Giorgio Armani Rouge D'Armani Lipstick in 400  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Medium Skin: Giorgio Armani Rouge D’Armani Lipstick in 400
Another formula with the makeup artist stamp of approval is Giorgio Armani’s Rouge D’Armani Lipstick in 400, a high-octane red with a velvety matte texture. “It’s a perfect red,” Murphy says. “[It has] a great balance of blue and orange, the formula lasts a long time, and is sumptuous.”
$38 (Shop Now)
Estée Lauder Pure Color Envy Matte Sculpting Lipstick
The Estée Lauder Pure Color Envy Matte Sculpting Lipstick in shade Volatile is a pigmented, warm red that both illuminates and defines your smile. Its lavish hue coats lips in a drenching high-coverage pigment that sculpts lips with a mattified texture. Pair this warm hue with a classic cat-eye to nail that vintage glam look. Shop Here

Dark Complexions

Nars Semi Matte Lipstick in Shanghai Express  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Dark Skin: Nars Semi-Matte Lipstick in Shanghai Express
Few beauty looks are as unapologetic as a bold red lip, but if you want a subtler take on rouge, try a semi-matte formula like Nars’s lippie in Shanghai Express, which Henney loves for its warm, brick hue that glows on dark skin.
$28 (Shop Now)
Marc Jacobs Beauty Enamored Hydrating Lip Gloss Stick in Black Cherry Baby  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Dark Skin: Marc Jacobs Beauty Enamored Hydrating Lip Gloss Stick in Black Cherry Baby
“Darker skin tones can play with deeper, warmer reds,” says makeup artistMorgane Martini (who happens to be a Marc Jacobs Beauty Global Artistry Ambassador). “But I believe that ultimately you can rock any red because it also depends on the desired lipstick application and texture – for example, sheer or very defined.” Case in point: A glossy tinted balm which gives red lipstick a casual, versatile twist.
$28 (Shop Now)
The Lip Bar Matte Liquid Lipstick in Red  best red lipsticks according to skin tone
Dark Skin: The Lip Bar Matte Liquid Lipstick in Red
For deeper skin tones, Oquendo recommends taking inspiration from the red carpet for your perfect red lipstick shade. The Lip Bar Matte Liquid Lipstick in Red fits the bills with its lush, stay-put formula. And a major plus is it’s from a black-owned beauty brand.
$13 (Shop Now)
Best Red Lipsticks For Dark Skin: Pat McGrath Labs MatteTrance Lipstick
Pat McGrath Labs Matte Trance Lipstick  Shop Here
Best Red Lipsticks For Dark Skin: Yves Saint Laurent Tatouage Couture Matte Lip Stain
Yves Saint Laurent Tatouage Couture Matte Lip Stain  Shop Here
Too Faced Melted Matte in Lady Balls
The Melted Matte formula from Too Faced is a lipstick lover’s dream come true. It applies like a gloss but dries to an ultra-matte finish, providing a super easy way to achieve opaque lips. Not for the faint hearted, Lady Balls is a vibrant true red that really pops against warm and deep skin tones and is easy to pull off. Shop Here

From Victim to Survivor: Domestic Violence a Disease more Deadly than Covid-19

I have to take a literal gigantic breath as I begin to write this very personal post. It’s not for fear of the consequences of divulging such personal accounts, but the huge knots it creates in my chest; a psychosomatic response to re-living traumatic experiences. I cannot begin to tell you how many times I began to write this then had to stop. I’d get doubtful and insecure as I’d stew over the vulnerability one faces when we talk about our truths that may touch on less than favorable aspects of our past. I have never shied away from talking about personal questionable life choices as a means to relate with others easily to remove some of those communication barriers. I have typically communicated them in the most digestible of ways; leaving out the darker aspects that perhaps are too heavy to unload on anyone that isn’t being paid to endure it.

But you see since the pandemic closures and increased isolation, according to John Hopkins Medicine the rate of murder-suicide, in which a male partner kills a female and then himself, has risen since the same time last year. In my personal network, I’ve been inundated with reports of domestic violence and abuse that has sent me on countless occasions into a tailspin of worry and concern for those involved. I’ve lost a close family member to a murder suicide, leaving two small children behind to face a life without either parent. And then there is my story which lead me to the decision to share in hopes others can relate and identify the warning signs or a way out.

It would be about 20 years ago that I finally left a very horrific and abusive relationship. I was an extremely naïve and sheltered teen, having grown up fairly normal, in fact very privileged. I had attended a prestigious boarding school where the evils of the world I’m sure existed, however in my little world did not. I had heard rumblings of inappropriate teacher student sexual relationships, and the odd senior who was rumored to have used cocaine. I had high school boyfriends who were all respectful, polite, in which nothing occurred outside of the typical adolescent dramatic heartbreaks.

Once I had graduated I had taken off immediately to University in Ottawa, following my high school boyfriend so we could be together forever. By year two I had fallen out of love and into the lap of this beautiful Haitian Spoken Word Poet who played the guitar, spoke French and burned incense while we canoodled on a mattress on a floor. That ended when my time at University in Ottawa ended, as did my tolerance for the smell of burning incense. My repertoire of lovers had been always a beautiful sequence of experiences and lessons in which shaped my view on love and loyalty. I felt empowered, desired, and fearless in my trust of others with my body, mind and soul.

I didn’t know otherwise. The universe had not shown me everything yet.

I look back often and ask myself when did things go so wrong for me. I have enough self awareness now to acknowledge that I have always had a curious flare for mischief and risk. The excitement attached to choices I’ve made repeatedly have always been self indulgent in nature, and in my immaturity lacked foresight. I’ve often ignored consequences; drunk off the adrenaline rush and for the most part got away with a majority of the poor choices I made. Right up until I met B.R.

You see B.R. was a bouncer at a popular nightclub I used to work at in Vancouver. He was gigantic. This was new to me, and I was attracted to the dangerous disposition he possessed. There were no boys or men like this at my boarding school or University. He was the unicorn I wanted to ride. My 19 year old self was fascinated by the celebrity status he appeared to have with crowds of people who’d line up outside and ask for him by name. He was the gatekeeper of all things cool to my little 19 year old brain. What I knew was that I wanted to be associated with that illusion of power and importance. And as things progressed it was just that…all an illusion.

I would learn as we began dating all about his criminal involvement, drug dealing, and of course the women he was still dealing with. You would think that all those red flags would be enough to high tail it in the other direction. Not this girl. I wanted more. I wanted to be a bad girl. The boarding school student, University student life was too vanilla for me. It bored me and I thought I could handle it, I mean I had a promising future what could shake that up?

I was getting a lot of attention at 19 as I had learned to embrace my shape and sporting a blonde T-Boz haircut. I was working the VIP section, serving athletes like Gary Payton when the Celtics were in town playing the Vancouver Grizzlies. It was the height of the R&B era in the clubs and it was a spectacular time to be in mix, where I was situated front and center. I was hooked and I couldn’t be swayed in any other direction.

As the courtship begun with B.R. I recall one night I would be followed from my work to my condo where a car pulled up in front of my gate in which a screaming tall blonde came plummeting out of her car to confront me. Allegedly I had stole her man. I hadn’t cared – I was seemingly winning the battle. She would continue to stalk my work place, bringing her friends to watch and attempt to intimidate me. I’d be told over and over I was the only one and made to feel that way as other girls would look on with what I had assumed was jealousy. I wish I had enough smarts then to have walked away…that would have been the first chance that I had to do so.

Eventually B.R. and I would move in together. To be honest there is a lot that I don’t remember but I know that it was filled with every kind of abuse under the sun. I was being groomed during this time to eventually be trafficked the way he saw fit or when I would be sold. Car notes, cell phones and insurance would be put in my name, where I had no idea. Bill collectors would call the home of my parents looking for me where I’d adamantly deny that the man I was with could not have done this to me. If I confronted him, I’d be met with painful and degrading verbal abuse that only sunk me further into the belief I was nothing without him. He would not return home for days, leaving me wondering where he was and who he was with. I’d sob on the floor of my shower waiting for is return which with every passing hour it would cut deeper and deeper into my self esteem and whatever pride I had left. He had been using drugs heavily during these times and would return home strung out and agitated, and I was oblivious to it. I hadn’t seen hard drugs and I didn’t know what hard drug use looked like. He’d come home one morning in a psychosis where I was woken up by him on top of me with a gun to my head, and in the next moment, it would go off accidentally; hitting the pillow and passing through the wall out the siding of the building. Another time him and his friend would rob our apartment, taking anything of value. He’d later try to say it was probably “one of my little boyfriends” which only was a way to deflect the heat away from him.

Another time I’d had enough after a terrible beating where I was able to get away and call police from a payphone on Davie Street. I’d make the mistake of telling police that he had a gun and where I believe he had gotten it from. I would learn that there was already an ongoing investigation involving the parties mentioned. That action in itself would make me fearful to live or return to Vancouver for almost a decade. Its the fear of those consequences that made me decide to join the same man that I had called police on in San Diego where he had managed to get past the border and elude police. You see I was 3 months pregnant by this time and a very damaged shell of a human being. B.R. had been successful in isolating me from my family and everyone or thing that loved me- having me to believe that my only option was him. I left with no warning and no belongings other than some clothes and whatever mementos I could pack in a couple of suitcases.

I’d spend the next 5 months living in San Diego. In the beginning my parents had worked with Vancouver City Police to locate me and they were successful however I was not able to provide a statement to police that I had been coerced to leave or had been kidnapped. The term “grooming” hadn’t really been a term used a lot in addition the way they had executed the search for me was terrifying. We had been surrounded by SWAT and when we were asked to exit guns were drawn and pointing at myself and him. I was under the impression I was in trouble and was going to do anything to get out of it. As I sat in the back of a cruiser and asked b a male tactical officer if “I was okay?” I remained silent. They would release me back to him where he’d unleash the worst beating I’d ever had experience from him resulting in chunks of my hair ripped from my head and a swollen jaw. I’d spend the remaining months stuck in a small apartment with no furniture, often hungry with no means of communication with the outside world. Sometimes I’d be able to walk a ways to find a payphone and call home where I’d tell my parents everything was good. I couldn’t risk another mess up like before.

They knew otherwise that I wasn’t at all good and as painful as it was they would await the moment I’d call and signal for help. As my baby grew bigger in my belly so did the desire to have enough strength to call and make arrangements for my escape. I’d walk in the hot San Diego sun down El Cajon Boulevard to that payphone and make a collect call to my mom and dad in British Columbia. My dad would leave their house immediately and make the 16 hour drive to com get me, only stopping for gas. When B.R. left that morning, I’d gather my belongings as quickly as possible and begin the drive home to Canada, back to safety as it seemed. I’d go onto to experience almost a year of peace from that day on starting my new life as a mom to my beautiful baby girl.

But a year is not long enough to undo the damage that had been done and in my loneliness I’d romanticize the idea that perhaps our daughter would soften his heart and encourage a new start. The communication started slow and I’d be suckered into believing that he was sorry. Somehow he’d miraculously been able to make it back over the boarder again to B.C. where he indicated he wanted to meet his daughter. Being a mother at 22, I faced some unique challenges with the familiar feeling of isolation happening to me again. My friends at this time were still in University and none of them to my knowledge could relate or empathize with the situation I had found myself in. I felt like I had no one to talk to and had not yet faced the ability to share with my parents what had happened to me. I had not yet even processed what had happened to me yet, I was just trying to survive and take care of my baby. I had not had a baby shower and the arrival of my daughter was not the celebratory affair that many of us experience in better circumstances. I had been so tired of everyone feeling sorry for me at this time and wanted to appear strong again. I was primed again to fall right back into the hands of the devil nd so I did.

It would not be long before things fell right back into the same cycle of of abuse again. And it would not take long for it all to come to the moment where I’d live or die. And unlike the fog surrounding all of the other terrible accounts of abuse, this last time I would remember every minute. It would start on a Saturday morning when I’d be dropped off by a girlfriend who’s house I would have stayed at that night. My daughter was away visiting her grandmother for the weekend and I for the first time in over a year would go to a pub. I’d arrive at my little apartment I had gotten where I’d be met in the hallway by B.R. My house had been trashed and I could see my daughters toys, clothing and other belongings had been thrown out of the window as well in the dumpster below. I’d be accused of being with other men that night and called every disgusting name in the book over and over. When I had tried to leave I would be dragged to the bedroom where I was held for the next 24 hours. I would be punched so hard in the head I’d blackout and wake up hours later with him above me, spitting hateful things. I’d be allowed to take a shower to wash off the spit and urine that had been thrown on me, only to corner me more and have more urine and feces thrown at me. He’d rape me on the floor several times, choking me until I’d pass out. I’d pretend to be dead, in fact I thought I was, breathing shallow enough as to not give off movement in my chest. This would scare him enough to finally get up and leave the apartment. Hours later when I felt safe to move I’d find my way to the neighbors and call police for only the second time on him. My neighbor would then tell me that she heard me screaming but wasn’t sure what to do. He’d go to jail for a few months and then finally deported.

I’d never return again to a life with him, or maintain any contact, My daughter would never know her father and for all the right reasons. I would spare her and my family the gruesome details that I feared so much would shape their opinions of me. The same fear I face in sharing these details with you all. Other than the courts and the police who took my statements I would share only snippets of what I had endured. Last year I finally completed my trauma therapy, and would be delighted to find out that trauma therapy would not entail me to re-hash every painful detail I had carried on my shoulders for almost 2 decades. I’d learn so much about my resilience and finally begin to release the sense of shame I had carried with me for so long. You see shifting my perspective from being a victim of domestic violence, to being a survivor of domestic violence, has been monumental in my healing and ability to speak out proudly on the topic. The moment when I pretended to be dead was not an act of giving up, it was the will to live another day, and the moment that changed the outcome that allows me to be here today. It is what has allowed me to carry on working with families and children that encounter domestic violence, and what helps me engage with other girls facing sexual exploitation. It’s what lead me to a career in social work for the last 15 years. So many great things came from being a survivor and I feel just as passionate for others facing the same opportunity to change their outcomes.

As I conclude the hardest piece of writing I have ever done, I encourage you to connect with me if my story resonated with you. If I can be of any help, direct you to resources, safe houses, or be an ear to listen to please reach out! I urge others to talk about their experiences with trusted people who can offer a good ear or wisdom that may surprise you. Survivors are everywhere, even among those who seem like they have it all together. Below I have left a few tips to consider if you or a loved one is facing domestic violence.

What should I do to protect myself from domestic violence during the pandemic?

Links to services

Look Out for Warning Signs

Put a plan together if someone you are living with is:

  • being verbally or emotionally hurtful.
  • threatening you.
  • having episodes of explosive anger.
  • harming animals.

Steps You Can Take to Keep Yourself and Others Safe

  1. Find a place you can retreat to safely. Avoid the bathroom or kitchen.
  2. Enlist support from a trusted friend or family member you can call.
  3. If necessary, use a code word or phrase to indicate you need help.
  4. Memorize phone numbers of people and agencies you might need to call in an emergency.
  5. Make sure you can easily access:
    • cash.
    • identification (Social Security card and driver’s license).
    • birth and marriage certificates.
    • credit cards, safe deposit box keys and bank information.
    • health insurance information.
    • any documentation, photos, medical or police reports relating to previous episodes of abuse.

Are there apps or interventions for domestic abuse?

If you are feeling unsafe but are unsure if someone you are living with is being abusive, apps may help provide some clarity on whether or not you are at risk.

MyPlan is an app for anyone having issues in a relationship, COVID-19 related or not. The app can help users determine if a partner’s behavior is showing signs of abuse. Also, users can get connected to resources personalized to their situation and their life priorities.

In-person interventions can work, too. Strength at Home is a program offered by the U.S. Veterans Administration to address the problem of veterans using violence against their domestic partners. It serves as a way to help address abusive behavior without demonizing the abuser. Random controlled trials have demonstrated that the program is effective.

Curating Creative Passive Aggressive Notes in a Time of Covid-19: New Ways to Drive Each Other Crazy.

We are 8 months into a pandemic that seems like its overstayed its welcome ten times over. They had predicted back in May, that the Pandemic would likely be here for the next 2 years. And in keeping with our theme today I’d like to tell Covid-19 a big old “Thanks in Advance for all your dedicated hard work, you really know how to kill it out there.”

I’m over talking about the C-word and perhaps we can find some unity in a world that has become more divided in a time where it no longer is just Donald Trump’s fault. I’m sure we have all had the opportunity to get to know our partners, room-mates, kids and family far more intimately since being home more. Up to this point my partner and I have exhausted every possible petty argument imaginable that we have no choice but to get along now. I think we may have single handedly invented a new method on how to save a marriage in 8 months…wait for the book! It was encouraging to come across this post “73 Ridiculously Stupid Things Couples Fight About,” and check off every single one of them. Needless to say that the serenity has bored me, and I’m left wondering how can I be a next level pain in his ass.

Stupid Things Couples Fight About
This is about right….

One may ask why would I engage in pure flagrant behavior, and risk severing the life and limbs of my relationship? Well you see I’m diagnosed with Adult Attention Deficit Disorder, and I get bored very easily if I do not have new ways of interacting with the world or engaging in meaningful and productive activities. Also, this asshole never puts the empty toilet paper rolls into the garbage- he leaves them on the floor next to the toilet. If you are not on my level of petty then you can see your way out- we are not the same people.

Ways To Reuse Toilet Paper Rolls and Other Cardboard Tubes - Reuse Grow  Enjoy

This is a new concept for me as I’m not subtle in my communication styles, which is surprising since my mother was queen of passive aggressive communication and punishment. I will be using her as my guest consultant as I proceed with my devious plan. Seeing as my partner pretends to read my blog I don’t anticipate he will know what’s up until I use this post in an argument down the road. I can visualize it now, I’ll store it away in the brain compartment labelled “Ammunition” to prove he doesn’t support my success and dreams in life when it seems fitting. I’ve already won the hypothetical argument and he doesn’t even know it.

So I have begun researching how I may address his toilet paper roll oversights in new ways that will perhaps keep our love fresh by tipping the scales of risk. I feel like the scales may tip in my favor at least in regards to some really great make-up sex if it blows up in my face. Below is a few ways that I will be adopting over the next month or so.

They Just Don't
Somehow dishes are not his nor hers nor anyone’s as claims are made that they weren’t even in the kitchen the make the mess. Yet here they lay.
Here Are The 20 Most Passive Aggressive Notes Ever Left. #6 Is Much  Deserved... LOL. - ViralServ
passive-agressive-toilet-paper-home
passive-agressive-clean-the-fridge
This seems like a great way to suggest that Fridge Cleaning is open to other days outside of the days he needs space for beer storage.
Leaving communal kitchens untidy is a common office gripe with one person using Post Its to express their dissatisfaction with their co-workers
I’ll take 500 of these please.
When sales promotions go wrong: One shopper became enraged by a supermarket's promotional deals
Swears up and down he only had one.
i tolerate you cake wife prank
Finally a Cake I can make-Nailed it.
wife makes passive agressive flow chart for hunger
Robbie’s Wife can feel my pain.
When things are getting a little boring in your relationship, the best way to spice things up is with a sexy dress-up session..
When a husband asks for something, what does a good wife do?
There are two ways to handle an argument: draw it out for ages and ignore each other until someone relents, or make a slightly funny retort and forget the whole thing.

I should have probably began this post with a disclaimer that I am not a licensed relationship counselor. I could probably be described more appropriately as the antagonist villain in regards to all things relationship related. I like to keep things dangerous, teetering on the ledge, holding a match over a barrel of gasoline. You may be wondering how can you find success in a relationship with this kind of attitude.

I’m so busy coming up with new ways to challenge and test our relationship through laughter, humor, and being unapologetically myself that I don’t have much use for the real relationship killers. When playfully researching ways to get under my boo’s skin I came across How to Annoy Your Boyfriend and it mentioned common habits that are real killers. It mentions things like being on your Phone all the time, or abusing it as a means to be over controlling. Mind Games was another point and it breaks down many identifiable habits couples engage in. Playing up Insecurities by acting jealous, or limiting their time with friends, running their phone down. Being a Diva, and that’s not confined to just women! This includes Demanding things that are not financially realistic, always making a fuss over little things, chronically prioritizing your needs above theirs to name a few.

As I conclude I hope you can appreciate my tongue and cheek approach to the obvious challenges we are all facing. Whether it be in our romantic or within our platonic relationships as we continue to hunker down in our social bubbles. Try not to burst yours because unlike the pandemic relationships can be here forever.

Now go and get busy messing with your significant other. Give them a Big Ol’ Wet Willy and tell them Cece told you too!

Follow my Instagram for daily videos of me annoying my boyfriend.

Happy Pestering!

PLANNING OUTFITS IN ADVANCE WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE: 8 Benefits that Will Make the Difference

☁️ Spoiled Princess ☁️ | Spoiled quotes, Quotes, Queen quotes

Let me begin with saying that this Chica misses getting dressed for the office as I have been a part of the millions who are now working from home for the most part. While my job still requires me to leave my home, it often doesn’t make much sense to carry out the full routine for only a short period of the day. Getting dressed up now is often coupled with comments from my boyfriend suggesting I either have a hot date or I’m meeting the girls for happy hour.

This is a comical considering neither have happened in far too long. *Ahem*

I am long over the initial online shopping frenzy of the early pandemic days when I had imagined coming out of the pandemic lockdown and sporting a new #ootd every day of the week in celebration of re-entering society. Those dreams are long gone, washed away along with the 28 inch waistline I intended to have by the end of the summer. As I sit here eating Nutella from a spoon wearing my boyfriends oversized Alabama Crimson Tide Sweater, paired with Monday’s Yoga Pants my sadness deepens. And not because my waistline isn’t 28 inches but rather 34 inches, but because the outfit does not reflect my creativity and personal style when it comes to expressing myself through fashion. I wish I could be as forgiving as the stretch in my Yoga Pants on the matter, but I simply cannot take this laying down any further.

Literally I cannot…I have bruised ribs from a Snowboarding Fall. Laying down hurts. And so does breathing.

This cracks me up and I'm thinking I will wear comfy clothes 24/7 now. Lol

I had intended on photographing more of my #ootd and I think we can call agree Yoga Pants will not cut it. I continue to watch and admire Instagram Feeds and admire the flow of beautiful content being produced and wonder how are you all staying so motivated? It often makes me feel like I’m living in parallel universe and I’m on the side of the fence where everything is going to shit. I’m not travelling anywhere in which would provide opportunities for exotic photo ops, and frolicking down a cute cobble stone road whimsically holding a basket of fresh flowers. There are no glamorous nights out capturing me in all my glory popping the Champagne; my perfectly outlined Chanel Red Lips beaming with Dom kissed elation. It’s Winter here in Calgary where I’d typically be sporting some beautiful knee high boots with rich sweater dresses and holiday sparkled ensembles. But things just aren’t happening in my world that would even warrant the kind of effort I typically have applied in the past to a Wine Wednesday evening out. In addition we as a Province just entered a State of Health Emergency so I’m really not going anywhere.

But I still managed on Sunday to get back into the habit of planning my outfits for my work week. This is something I used to do habitually which I feel has often made my life so much easier. There are so many benefits to laying out your outfits ahead of time.

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  1. You get to sleep longer since you don’t have to mess about trying to find or put together an outfit. Who doesn’t love an extra 15-20 minutes of beauty sleep. Pre-planning outfits means you don’t have to think about what to wear after the alarm rings.
  2. You avoid Outfit Blunder Frustration that creates “Morning Stress”- Ever start your day upset because you cant find something to wear, cutting into your ability to stop at Starbucks drive thru. It just spirals down-hill from here. Why do another task in the morning when there is already so much to do? It can be a mad scramble getting you and your family out the door as it is. Don’t spend precious moments reconsidering what goes together, what is appropriate for the day’s activities and what is clean. Why empty your closet as you toss things about, trying to find where you put that nude-for-you camisole, or those shoes you thought you put in the bin under your bed? Alternatively, if you gather all the parts of your outfit the night before, you reduce that morning craziness.
  3. You Get Noticed-When you are well put together people appreciate the efforts you take. Confidence can be contagious. When you can put what you are wearing at the back of your mind, you feel happier about your clothes. If you are not irritated by the clothes you yanked on at the last minute, unhappy with the forced, early morning decisions you had to make, you will be more content with the clothing you already own. Stylish people look put-together. It’s easier to look put-together when you’ve spent some time and thought putting an outfit together. If increasing your stylishness is your goal, outfit planning is a sure-fire way to get there.
  4. You are more likely to wear things in your closet that have been tucked away gathering dust. Generally, we have a tendency to wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time. This seems like a bit of a waste of clothes, dollars and closet space. Make a plan to figure out how to wear those items that you never seem to wear. Put your closet to work for you. You are less likely to feel like you have nothing to wear if you spend a few extra minutes building an outfit around some of the clothing items you haven’t been wearing.
  5. When you have a visual reminder of what you have you are far less likely to shop for things you already have, and saving your money!
  6. Finding new ways to wear things in your wardrobe can be so fun and provide you hours of music fueled entertainment during a time that we are spending much more time at home.
  7. Advertising your gift of style in your personal life as well as via social media could lead to side jobs like being a personal shopper, stylist, or closet consultant.
  8. Going through your closet allows you to get rid of stuff that is ready for donation and no longer serves purpose taking up space in your closet. As Marie Kondo would say “By acknowledging their contribution and letting them go with gratitude, you will be able to truly put the things you own, and your life, in order.”

Above I have what I’d call a Casual Friday Outfit that’s ready for the Happy Hour Girls that keep it going long after Happy Hour is done. I like that you can either strip the blouse and wear the body suit with some high waisted booty hugging jeans, or strip the body suit and wear a sexy black bra under the floral blouse for an equally seductive look.

Above I can mix and match jackets, tops, pants and shoes. I’m in love with a Chanel inspired look that again can shed layers interchangeably.

Tips on How to Make It Happen

  • When you are putting together an outfit, think about using a completer piece. Pick out the completer piece first and build the outfit around it.
  • Some will pick out their shoes first and build the outfit around them. Shoes do a great job of setting the tone for what you will wear. Also, shoes are one closet item that bring a lot of people closet joy.
  • If you plan your outfit ahead, you are more likely to wear accessories. Accessories go a long way to looking stylishly put-together. Accessories are like the icing on the cake. It’s hard to ice a cake when you’re eating bites of breakfast in between blowdrying and demands to sign permission forms.

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Out with the Old in with the New: A Guide to my Favorite Top 10 Christmas Tree Trends

Last year I was forced to finally dispose of my old Christmas Tree when we were in the middle of moving. My boyfriend had mentioned that the only way I was actually going to get the new white one I had been admiring was to ditch the old $25.00 bargain one I had found at Army & Navy. My bargain tree was mainly kept as a piece of nostalgia for all these years after it was bought after a drunken lunch with a my close friend April. I remember somehow we wound up there and I had never stepped foot in an Army& Navy before, so you can imagine how in Awe I was with the isles of random shit and necessary junk. We tested several 5star tents for comfort as well as an opportunity to sneak some purse wine until we came across the too good to be true Tree Deal. We pranced out of Army & Navy that day with our new trees and a warning that indoor tent drinking was not acceptable behavior for such an establishment. This coming from a store that sells Pocket Knives and Febreeze on the same isle…could have fooled me!

So here I am 11 months later and I have finally bought my beloved new white 9 ft tall tree. What I neglected to remember is that it will require a complete decoration overhaul. So with a new tree comes the need for a new theme to match the new home. I’ve been busy pintresting and seeking design inspo for this hefty task and thought I’d share some of the ones that have really stood out for me.

modern farmhouse christmas tree with hunter green, black, white and silver. hygge and hearth & hand inspired.
https://www.pinterest.ca/pin/303359724898381884/